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    By who you are · 7 tips

    Same-sex couples and sexual minorities

    Sexual health, how to respond to family, and one tip about marriage. Legal arrangements for same-sex couples are not covered here.

    1 Legally

    Is dating and marriage worth it?

    Don't marry while hiding your sexual orientation, and don't treat a marriage in name only (形婚) as a convenient shortcut: legally it is a real marriage, and the only way out is divorce

    Marrying while hiding your sexual orientation is neither void nor annullable in law, and the only way out is divorce. A marriage in name only (形婚) is also a real marriage, and the money earned after the wedding counts as the couple's joint property, and debts the two sign for together or that are borrowed for the family's everyday spending also count as the couple's. The deceived side can ask at divorce for a larger share of property and compensation for emotional harm, but whether the courts will support this is not settled.

    • Moderate value
    • Evidence A
    • Saves money

    2 Sexual health

    Don't die early

    If you are a man who has sex with men and has high-risk sex, ask a designated HIV hospital about pre-exposure prophylaxis; taken on schedule, it cuts infections by about 70%

    People who are not yet infected take an antiviral drug in advance, called pre-exposure prophylaxis. For those who take it on schedule, the risk of infection falls by about 70%. For those who take it on and off, it does almost nothing. It is a prescription drug: you first get checked at a hospital, then it is prescribed, then you return for regular checkups.

    • Moderate value
    • Evidence A
    • Buys life
    Don't die early

    After any high-risk act, get tested for HIV once; the CDC tests for free and keeps the result confidential

    Testing for HIV at the CDC (疾控) is free. Without your own consent, no organization or individual may disclose your name, address, workplace or medical history. A positive result is not a death sentence: people who keep taking medication and bring the virus down to undetectable do not pass it on to their sex partners. Among such partners in the study, not a single case was transmitted.

    • High value
    • Evidence A
    • Buys life
    Don't die early

    Use a condom for the whole of every sexual act, and don't share needles with anyone

    Worn every time and throughout, a condom cuts the chance of passing on HIV between a man and a woman by roughly 70% or more. Using one “most of the time” does little better than not using one. It also protects against other sexually transmitted infections, but syphilis and herpes sores that appear where the condom doesn't cover can't be blocked.

    • High value
    • Evidence A
    • Buys life

    3 Family

    Children once they start school

    Don't scold a child who says they like the same sex, throw them out or send them for “conversion”: how the family reacts is linked to whether they attempt suicide

    Among middle school students in China, children who like the same sex or like both sexes were about 3 to 5.5 times as likely as others to have attempted suicide in the past year. Research abroad has found that children who were strongly rejected by their families in adolescence later attempted suicide far more often. Children whom parents sent for “conversion” also attempted suicide far more often.

    • High value
    • Evidence B
    • Buys life
    • For: Child aged 3–18
    What not to buy

    Don't pay for “sexual orientation conversion” or “homosexuality treatment,” and don't send a family member to it

    An expert panel of the American Psychological Association, after reviewing the research, said that this kind of conversion cannot change sexual orientation and may harm people. In one U.S. survey, people who had gone through conversion were nearly 90% more likely to have had suicidal thoughts. In China, a psychiatric hospital involuntarily admitted a man under the label “sexual preference disorder” (性偏好障碍); a court found infringement and ordered 5000 CNY in compensation.

    • Top value
    • Evidence B
    • Buys life
    • Disputed

    Related

    This site arranged the groups and order on this page; the tips come from the book. About